Kanamara Matsuri – Penis Festival

Saturday, April 17th, 2010 in: News, Travel

When I wrote about the Hadaka Matsuri (Naked Man Festival), I mentioned there were other “weird festivals” in Japan. I didn’t really have an intention to visit any of the other ones, but when I went to hanami, my friends were talking about going to the penis festival the following day. Since it was literally just a few stations away from the yo-yo event I was going to visit, how could I resist?

Straight from Wikipedia:

The Kanamara Matsuri is centered around a local penis-venerating shrine once popular among prostitutes who wished to pray for protection against sexually transmitted diseases. It is said that there are divine protections also in business prosperity and the clan’s prosperity, easy delivery, marriage, and married couple harmony. There is also a legend of a sharp-toothed demon that hid inside the vagina of a young girl and castrated two young men on their wedding nights (vagina dentata). As a result, the young girl sought help with a blacksmith, who fashioned an iron phallus to break the demon’s teeth, leading to the enshrinement of the item.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1fH2YrMHWw

Definitely a different kind of festival, but it’s developed into something of a novelty for locals and foreigners to come just to celebrate all things phallic. Indeed, when we arrived at the festival, the ratio of foreigners was even higher than at the Hadaka Matsuri. To make things even more interesting, most of them were walking around sucking on genital-shaped lollipops. The temple grounds were tightly packed with people laughing sophomorically at all the penis shapes around them. A crowd had formed around two large wooden penises set at an angle like missiles ready for blast off, taking turns mounting them like Falkor the Luckdragon. Several people were really getting into the spirit, making lewd gestures with giant wooden penises and wearing penis headbands. Some people came dressed (innapropriately) for the occasion; one guy in a halloween penis costume, another middle-aged white guy marching around in a loose fundoshi; the same kind of loincloth guys wear for the Hadaka Matsuri, but this guy was a prime example of how NOT to wear a fundoshi. This guy stuck out of the crowd so much, everyone I talked to later asked me if I saw the guy with all the red ass-hair. Thanks for putting on a good front for the rest of us, buddy. Next time could you do a better job at having some shame, and hiding it?

We watched the giant penis mikoshi floating down the street on the shoulders of local volunteers, both men and women. The mikoshi made their way to the temple for the festival’s ceremonies. We tried to follow it but couldn’t get more than 10-15 meters away. The crowd was so thick it was impossible to move any closer. We watched for a while before I sensed that the ceremony was coming to a close, so I started to shuffle my friends back outside the temple grounds to beat the stampede. In all, I’d say the premise of the festival was far more interesting than its reality; definitely not a must-see, unless you like giggling about penises and having embarrassing photos of you taken by strangers…

Having successfully warded off the clap, we went to the yo-yo event at Lazona near Kawasaki Station, to see Hiro and the guys. We’d forgotton to take a group photo while I was in Nagoya, so we posed in front of a stylish purse store. Black was there (Ishiguro-san), and I congratulated him on passing the audition for Cirque du Soleil. We hung out for a while, catching up on everything, and the guys had to hit up Costco and Ikea before they left, so I saw them off and found a California Pizza Kitchen with Brian and Kaoru. For the record, CPK in Japan is practically identical to back home, if you’re willing to pay the premium.

Kaoru had to head home, so I saw her off and rejoined the others. Eric’s girlfriend, Shoko, joined us and we met up with Okabe-kun and some other friends of Brian and Eric’s. When I met them, we both squinted in faint recognition, and later realized we studied in Japan at the same time, but at different schools. He’d come back with his girlfriend to teach English for one of the Eikwaiwa (English Conversation schools). We grabbed dinner at Saizeriya and dessert at Krispy Kreme. The girls behind the counter took an interest in all the foreigners hanging around, and Eric relished in showing off his photos from the festival, and their amused but embarrassed reactions. I guess there’s an added bonus to going to these weird festivals after all, they do make for interesting conversation…

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